It is not embarrassing for me to discuss the loves in my life. I have only had a few. I have had many relationships but very few loves in my life…
The best would have to be the one who motivated me to even write my many thought and that would have to be Gary Payton. Oh my I could write a whole book about a weekend in Seattle with him…
Have you ever met a guy who swept you off your feet from the moment you laid eyes on each other.. How about being with someone who you “locked up with” for three days straight with the exception to the time you had to spend out of the room making personal appearances and to handle business… How about a guy who fits so perfectly that you did not mind him just “laying in” even when the fun was all over? I met that fella in GP, yes ladies he is all that and some.
Now I have friends who have dated him since, they were only after money, fame or to share his fame, I guess that is why I love the fact that we met Pre~NBA so all of the glitz and glamour had not settled in yet. He was not use to all the wannabes and their lustful desire to hang onto him for a name. When we met it was pure innocence.
It was NBA Draft Night, Dawn and Sonya came over to my house and we had the official NBA party at my house. I was living in a little studio back then, humble yet modest. Away from all the fancy stuff, just me… I had wall papered the bathroom and painted it myself, little projects to make a house feel like a home.
This year DH decided she would come over to my house we all use to joke about what something someone did not have… for example, one of us would have a car but no phone, one would have no job but a car, and one would have no apt but a credit card. Together we all made each other fit into the mix putting together our ain’t gots with our gots to make a get is together bunch… This year I had cable so everyone came to my house to watch the draft. During the picks DH said who do you like and I can remember GP stepping on that platform and I nearly lost it, I mean really lost it…
It was his swagger I guess, the first thing I remember is him kissing and hugging his family, to me that says a lot about a man if he has respect for his mother. After all if you don’t respect the woman who brought you into the world you surely won’t respect many others past her. I mean I wanted to scream it was just a feeling I got when I looked at him.
DH having the experience she did, the inside info she said, call him. I was like that man don’t know me, she insisted and said he will be in his room in a minute call him and picked up the phone to dial his hotel number. I was the only one with long distance on my phone.
How she had all these numbers always amazed me but hell I did not complain, she dialed the hotel and I asked for his room…
Operator: How may I direct your call?
Foolishly I responded Gary Payton please, knowing that if I heard his voice I would freeze… but he answered…
GP: Hello (in a DMX voice…) raspy and hard like…
CAV: Is this Gary Payton?
GP: Yeah, who is this?
CAV: I know you don’t know me but please don’t hang up, my girls and I were watching the draft and if I cannot do anything else I wanted to call you and tell you that you are sexy as hell.
He laughed modestly and said that his room was filled with people and for me to call back after 10 PM that night, I quickly agreed and hung up the phone… we screamed like crazy kids… and the others made their calls.
By 10 that night I had counted the minutes up to the time I would call him back, finally when I kicked everyone out of my apartment I got the nerve together to call him back and ask for his room again, he answered the phone and we started talking about the draft, his new team, his family and other topics. Our conversation initially lasted about 30 minutes before he stated he had some parties to get ready for but like my conversation, he then told me that he would probably be busy the rest of the trip but gave me his home phone number in Oakland to call him back when he got there which would be in 2-3 days.
I took the number put it on a table next to my bed (by the phone) and did not allow anyone near it.
Days later I called him and we would spend hours on the phone talking about everything from the weather, his parents, his mother his (step) father, Pops owned a restaurant in Oakland and I told him I would come to Oakland to help him cook if he ever decided to take over the family business. I talked to his friends; family I even met his mother, Mamma Annie. When GP would get pre occupied talking to his friends, he refused to cut the call he would just hand his mother the phone and say here talk to my mom. Go do what he was doing and then come back to the phone sometimes many moments later…
This went on from June until October when it finally came time to go to Seattle. I thought that this was just a phone affair when one day he asked me so when am I going to meet you and the conversation progressed to when do you want me to meet you?
We settled on his trip to Seattle, this would be the first time he would be alone handling NBA business and he could break away from family and other distractions. So we agreed Seattle, he refused to pay for my ticket there, stating he was not sure if I would show up but that if I came he would handle the rest and that he did.
I remember getting off the plane and he was right there at the gate waiting for me the moment I stepped off. Everyone recognized him and he was so confident walking thru the airport. He took me straight to baggage claim and to the car. His agents (the twins) were with him, I remember their names were Eric and E? but I cannot remember the second. They grabbed my bag and GP grabbed my hand and swept me to the car. I can remember the knots in my stomach thinking over all the details we discussed via phone.
We never really had kinky conversations only clean ones occasionally he would ask me questions about my freak out for the most part that 5 month period was a getting to know you time where we only talked about each other.
We go to the room and about half an hour there he told the twins “Okay you can leave now” I thought that was pretty straight forward but what he did after really surprised me. I was waiting lying on the bed for him to discuss whatever (I guess they were getting the approval or what) and he released them to leave. I was on the bed just resting and he moved in up on me from behind. Ladies I don’t know what he did with everyone else, but I love a man who commands the bed don’t you. I did not have to give instructions or point to spot, he undressed me and did what he came to do.
Sex was awesome; we only stopped to each and relieve ourselves. He kept bragging on his “break neck speed” a term he used to define his swift strokes.. I tease him every time I see him asking, getting too old for that BNS hun?” I don’t know if he still uses that one but it is our little joke. I think if I had to remember we spent about 10 hours total not having sex from Friday about 1 PM to Sunday about 6 pm when I left, that time would include the day window shopping, going out to lunch (I was determined to find fish in Seattle, their trademark food), hanging out at the twins house, the time he spent at the office so I could rest and the night at the night club. Other than that we were locked up in that room, catering to each other’s desire…
People often ask me why that relationship was the one that stood out the most and I can intellectually speak on this now that I look back with comfort. Gary was the first black man who showed me respect and does to this day. I mean I know that sound strange and you could say it was because we spent so much time getting to know each other prior to our meeting. But this was like no other date I had ever had before.
I have never been treated that well by a black man.
Sure I have dated many men, different races, cultures, backgrounds. But no man ever treated me with that kind of affection, respect and admiration as he did that weekend.
I have a picture we took that Saturday night at the club of me sitting on his lap, if pictures could speak you would have thought I was that mans wife. Everything was all about me and that was so strange. Here he is the celebrity but it was all about my having a good time. I even asked permission to dance on the table at the club and he was not threatened by my freedom, which was strange. Most men freak out, hell nah you can’t get your ass up there, but he was like go ahead have fun baby.
Respectfully I asked because I did not want to do anything to embarrass him and his friends after all everyone knew him and this was his signing party, but I started having fun and when the fans saw how I was having fun they let go and got loose.
Gary got turned on and we barely made it out of the club before he was all over me in the car again… and they wonder why I like sex in the car so much… GP got me spoiled…
I think that night, I did not make it out of my clothes, he peeled me out of what I had on at the door, after that I remember nothing, but the bathroom, the shower, the sink and well you figure it out…
I cried all the way home on that flight back, wishing he would say some thing that would make me stay but knowing I had to go, I wanted to take a later flight, loose my ticket anything… but I knew it all had to end. Who knew it was just the beginning.